There's a lot to be done for us to "Lean In"

I read Sheryl Sandberg's "Lean In" within the first week it came out. I watched her TED talk a few more times, I read the New York magazine article on the "Retro Wife", and I've listened to other successful women speak about their versions of "Lean In". I am happy that this topic has entered the public arena again, that various parties are giving their opinons, that people are arguing about it. But, what do we all want and how do we get there?

We can do anything we want to, within reason. Okay, anyone who knows me knows I won't be on Broadway any time soon, but I did grow up believing that there is no difference between what women and men can achieve. I was encouraged to behave as me, not as a protype of what a girl should be. I didn't see lines between men and women, I saw opportunity. Sheryl Sandberg brings this up often: women are beholden to certain roles that we seemingly can't break, and when we do, we're reprimanded for forgetting to be the perfect housewife. Part of our job is encouraging everyone to act and do as they feel, not what a society believes our gender roles are.

Feminism is about choice, without judgement. Women judge each other; I judge other women. The truth is, changing this can only happen when we're all happy with the choices and opportunities we have. While this can be interpreted as naive, I believe it can happen. It's because we feel we need to cut each other down to rise up , that we've been unable to. Men should be able to put their families before work without judgement just a women should be able to hate cooking.

What about leaning in, everywhere? The conversation has touched on the workplace (more flexible materning & paternity leave) and the home (having a partnership), but there are other sections of our society that haven't evolved. Specifically, the family court system. While this topic could become a diatrabe of its own, in short - how can we expect equality when we have a system in place that allows women to play the victim and expect men to be the provider?

In speaking with my Grandmother, we need to be proud about the progress we've made. The opportunities in front of me are so very different from what she had. But, that also leaves us with a great responsibility to continue this trend that will hopefully dismantle the lines society has drawn. I expect that there will be a lot more to come from me on this topic.

Share your comments below so I can incorporate into my next blog.

#26Acts of Kindness

My Dad wrote me an email asking me to tweet for him. He told me that he had purchased a turkey for my family to eat on Christmas Eve (chinese food is only a tradition on Christmas Day), but instead was going to a church to donate the turkey and clothing for the victims of Hurricane Sandy. Of course my Dad would do this - he lives and breathes good deeds. But, I wondered why he wanted me to tweet about this for him.

He explained that Ann Curry had suggested we all take part in 26 acts of kindness to honor the victims of Sandy Hook Elementary school (#26Acts). After I initially realized my Dad was more up to speed on a social movement than I was, I did a bit of research on twitter. There was a ton of good deeds being done in the name of the victims. My Dad wanted to do this for Victoria Soto, the teacher who was killed protecting her students. She studied at Eastern Connecticut University, the same school as my younger brother.

I thought about this movement of paying it forward and that I do believe people are truly and inherently good. We know we can't change what happened, but we can put something great back into the world with small acts of kindness. Paying for the person in front of us, donating gently used clothing, writing a nice note - these are all positive pieces of energy.

In light of this blog's 2013 theme of doing something new- I want to spend January giving back. I have a few ideas:
     - NYC Cares coat donations (for homeless in and around NYC)
     - Cycle for Survival donations (for Memorial Sloan-Kettering and rare forms of cancer)
     - TapRoot Foundation volunteeing (Pro Bono Services)

What else would you suggest I do? What other causes should I look at? Leave your suggestions here and I will use them for my #26Acts.