Support system

Support has varying roles. Whether it's the brace I wore after I rolled my ankle in a pair of wedges last week, a customer service line (we're looking at you tech support) to help us fix that problem, or a shoulder to cry on after a bad day, support almost always means helping. All relationships require support, but not everything is as simple as the ankle brace example. What I mean here is that when I get hurt, my ankle brace 100% supports me, right? I use it for two days, feel better, and put that brace right back in the medicine cabinet. It doesn't need to talk about it's problems, bad day, paper cut, or anything. I receive all of the benefits without having to give anything back. Real relationships however, require a balance of asking for support and supporting. How this balance works is quite interesting.

When I take a look at my own relationships, I have ones where I am consistently asking for support and ones where I am giving more support. For instance, I have the luxury of having parents who will drop everything to listen to me, console me, and support whatever decision I make. Do I offer the same level of support to them? Likely not, but the role of a parent to a child is hardly ever 50/50 and they understand that. On the other hand, I have had friends who I offer advice to at all points, but I know are not able to offer that same support to me.

Then, there are relationships when the balance is more equal. When I look at my relationship with Zack, I see the support we offer each other, but the struggle to understand each other as well. Blind support is what parents are for, but with Zack it's ensuring we understand what we are supporting. There are few things, in my mind, as imperative as knowing that the most important people in your life have a "I will drop anything and be there for you" mentality. I used to think that came from the length of a relationship, but I realize that it is much more about the connection and trust you develop with someone. There are people I have met later in life who have proven time and again to be there when I need it.

For me, asking for help is hard. But, knowing that there are people lined up to help makes it easier to ask. Part of the balance is knowing when to ask, and for what issue. And conversely, it is also knowing when to simply be there when someone doesn't ask.We all have support systems. And we all have people we have to support. It's ensuring that the people we keep around are aware of the balance.